page contents

Questions for couples conversation starters

Are you looking for meaningful and engaging questions for couples? Well, today, you will discover 69 exciting, meaningful questions that will enhance your relationship.

To have better conversations you need good questions, and that is what we have compiled here for you. As you already might know, coming up with insightful, and engaging questions to discuss as a couple can be difficult.

That’s why we want to share these 69 thought-provoking conversation starters for couples with you; so you can strengthen your relationship.

The questions cover topics such as love, sex, money, communication, emotions, personality, dreams, intimacy, and so much more!

Note: These questions were taken from our best-selling book, Questions for Couples: 469 Thought-Provoking Conversation Starters for Connecting, Building Trust, and Rekindling Intimacy

69 Thought-provoking, sex, and romantic questions for couples

1. How do you feel most connected in our friendship?

How can we strengthen our friendship?

2. When do you feel emotionally connected to me?

3. What makes you uncomfortable when talking about sex?

4. What circumstances are you okay with going into debt for?

How do you feel about paying off debt?

Should we draw up a budget?

Should we create a plan for paying off our debt?

5. Tell me about a challenge you’ve had in your life.

What are you grateful for from experiencing that hardship, and what did you learn?

6. How would you like to start your ideal morning?

7. Have you ever felt rejected by me?

When did it happen? 

What did I do or say that made you feel rejected?

8. Have you ever resented me?

What was it for?

Is there something from your past that I have used against you before, perhaps unintentionally? What was it?

9. What have you been interested in or learning about lately?

10. What is one place you would like us to have sex but we have not yet?

11. In your opinion, what is the one thing we have argued about the most in the past ninety days?

What do you think is the root cause, and how can we resolve it?

12. When you talk about me with someone, do you have positive, negative, or neutral things to say?

What kind of feelings do you get when you think or talk about me?

13. Do you feel I am there for you when you need me?

What can I do to show you I am there for you?

14. What is your favorite memory of our wedding day?

What about our wedding night?

15. When do you feel respected by me?

When do you feel disrespected by me?

16. Which married couple do you look up to the most, and why?

17. How do you feel after we have sex?

What would you like to do right after sex?

Do you ever feel dirty or ashamed after we have sex?

18. What is one thing you discovered about me after we got married that you love?

What is one thing that you discovered about me after we got married that you dislike?

19. What is something I do that makes you feel loved the most?

What is something I do that makes you feel unloved?

20. How would you describe our relationship in three words?

21. What is better than amazing sex?

22. What is a question about life that you wish you had the answer to?

23. What were the highest points of your life?

What did you learn through those times?

24. What were the highest and lowest points of our relationship?

What did you learn through those times?

25. What is your first memory of me? Describe it in as much detail as you can remember.

26. How can we make our relationship affair-proof?

27. Do you find it difficult trusting me completely?

What is something I do now, or could do in the future, that makes you not trust me?

How can we build trust with each other?

28. How can we communicate better?

29. What does your ideal career look like?

30. Do you feel safe sexually with me?

31. What does your ideal life look like? Give details.

32. What do you want the atmosphere in our home to feel like?

33. What does the perfect relationship look like to you?

What is our relationship missing to be that perfect?

34. Have you ever saved someone’s life?

Has anyone ever saved your life?

35. What person (or people) had the most impact on your life, and how?

36. What do you do to get yourself in a better mood when you are not feeling great?

37. What book has influenced your life the most?

38. What would you do if I changed my religious beliefs?

39. What do you need to be in the mood for sex?

40. How do you feel about supporting family members financially?

What if one or more of your parents needed to be taken care of? Would they live with you?

What if it was a sibling that needed the full-time caregiver?

41. What makes you attracted to me – physically, emotionally, intellectually, spiritually?

42. How do you feel about lending money to family members?

How much?

What if we do loan them money and they do not pay it back?

What about loaning money to friends?

43. What brings you the most joy in our relationship?

44. What are you dreading in life right now?

45. What is something you have struggled with your entire life?

Does anyone know about it?

Why do you think you struggle with it?

Have you overcome it? If so, how did you overcome it?

46. What are the most important skills you learned from your parents?

47. What are three physical shows of affection you really enjoy from me and you wish I would do more often?

48. What turns you on sexually?

What turns you off sexually?

49. If you had to be on life support, would you want to continue to be kept alive?

What if you had no brain activity?

What if you were paralyzed?

What if you needed life support machines to remain alive for the rest of your life?

What if you were in a coma?

50. How do you feel the most connected to me intellectually?

What is one thing we can do this week to deepen that intimacy?

51. How do you feel the most spiritually connected with me?

What is one thing we can do this week to deepen that connection?

52. How do you feel the closest connection with me in these roles:

As an individual

Partner or spouse


What is one way we can improve our relationship connection in these areas this week?

53. What are the top five things you appreciate about me?

54. What sex acts do you find off-limits or consider gross?

55. What are some ways you like to socially interact with me?

56. Do you feel like you are getting enough time to spend with your friends and family? If no, what can we do to increase it without negatively impacting our relationship?

57. Do you feel stressed when dealing with financial issues? How do you deal with that stress?

What is one worry you have had about our money and finances in the past thirty days?

How can I help you to overcome this frustration or stress?

How should we prepare for a financial emergency?

58. Where are the spots that drive you crazy in a good way during sex?

Where are the places that drive you crazy in a bad way during sex?

Which part of your body would you like me to pay more attention to during sex?

59. How do you feel the most connected physically to me?

How do you want to be touched non-sexually?

What is one way I can make an effort this week to enhance that physical connection between us?

60. Do you have trouble opening up and talking to me about anything?

Do you find it difficult feeling intimate with me in any form?

Are you worried about being hurt?

Are there any secrets you have kept from me?

Is there any subject that you feel is too personal to talk to me about?

What is something about you that you feel I don’t need to know? Why?

What makes you not want to talk to me?

61. Do you feel unworthy of love?

62. What is something different you want to try in the bedroom?

63. Are you afraid of being controlled by me?

64. What makes you feel heard and understood when we communicate?

What distracts you from giving your undivided attention to me?

When do you feel you have my full attention?

Describe what “giving my full attention” to you means.

65. Do you empathetically listen to me to try and see where I am coming from when we disagree?

What communication style will help you to better understand me?

66. What are five things you love about me?

67. How often would you like to have sex each week as a minimum?

How often would you like to have sex each week as a maximum?

68. Can you think of a time you lost your patience with me?

What was the trigger?

How can you do better next time?

69. How do your parents communicate?

What do you like about how they communicate?

What don’t you like about it?

How do you communicate like them?

How do you communicate differently from them?

Discover 400 more questions for couples

If you want to discover more thought-provoking conversation starters for couples, get your copy of our best-selling book, Questions for Couples today.

Click here to get your copy now.

Great questions brings couples together

These conversation starters will help you get to know each other on a deeper level, enhance intimacy, and encourage personal growth so you can grow together as a couple.

In addition, each question will provide you with conversation starters that will really get you thinking, bring back great memories and create new ones of communicating with each other for hours.

You see, when you are able to have a great conversation with your husband or wife, you will be able to bond in unique ways that build trust.

Some great times to go over these questions for couples is during a date, game night, road trips, dinner, or bonfires.

A fun question game for couples

This game is simple. Use a random number generator to pick which question to answer then take turns answering the question chosen.

Another thing you can do is to write the number for each question on a small piece of paper, then put your written numbers into a bowl.

If you picked the number, you will ask the question, and your spouse will the first to answer it then vice versa.

For more games to play together, click here to discover the best board, card, and dice games for couples.

Final thoughts

The good news is that these questions for couples don’t revolve around your day to day life, such as the to-do-list or your children’s activities.

Discussing the questions with your spouse will certainly help you both open up more and get to know each other more intimately.

Pick the top 10 you love and discuss them with your husband or wife this weekend.

Your turn

Which of these questions for couples will you use as a conversation starter for your next date night, road trip, or dinner?

Image via Mathew Henry

PS: Discover 400 more thought-provoking questions for couples by reading this book today.

Pin It on Pinterest

Share This