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Finances have been an important topic in our relationship since we started dating. It is such an important topic because it is the number one cause of divorce in most marriages that end. Due to this fact, we wanted to make sure we were on the same page when it came to money.

When we started talking about it, we realized how different our mindsets were. Hubby comes from a culture and family that live without debt. I come from a culture so deeply in debt, and was raised to believe it was normal to have credit cards, car loans, even loans on furniture.

My husband introduced me to a radio show by Dave Ramsey. I admit I thought my husband (then boyfriend) was crazy for thinking someone could pay cash for a car, or even a house! Then I listened to the REAL people call in and share their stories of their journey to freedom from debt.

After we got married we read his book, “Total Money Makeover”, and it was like a paradigm shift for me. It felt GOOD having a $1500 emergency fund, instead of a credit card. The first two years we had a lot of things go wrong, and unexpected things did happen. Without that money we had saved we would have been in trouble.

The whole first year and a half of our marriage was spent not knowing how we were going to pay the next bill. I worked two, sometimes three jobs and picked up whatever odd jobs I could.

My husband came here on a student visa, so after we got married we applied for him to be a permanent resident. This process was expensive and took over a year, during which time my hubby was not legally allowed to work.

Hubby kept the house clean, cooked dinner, and continued his self development research. He also started buying and selling stuff online with an initial investment of 100$. He took the chance, didn’t give up and sit on his butt all day watching sports or playing video games.

This enabled me to see more of his character; we were a team. I saw how it was hard on him feeling like he wasn’t providing for me, feeling like a burden. I tried to express support to him in this time, as he did for me.

How did we make it through this? LOTS of communication, prayer, and patience!

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