page contents

patience in marriage couples husband wife

Patience in marriage is another critical factor for a healthy, happy, and fulfilling marriage.

It is one of those marriage lessons you will learn or need to learn after tying the knot if you want your marriage to succeed.

As you know, patience is a virtue! It’s also an important skill to have in your marriage toolbox.

But what does patience mean?

Well, patience is the ability to tolerate or restrain yourself from reacting in anger or frustration.

For example:

Have you ever had a slow computer or a computer that takes its sweet time to load after turning it on?

What did you do when the computer was being slow? You either waited patiently or began to complain about the computer being slow.

In either situation, did the computer perform any faster for you? The obvious answer is no, but either waiting with patience or complaining had two different effects on you. – Marcus

By being patient for the computer to load, your mood was calm and positive.

But when you complained, it’s as if you are fighting against a wall, which just irritates you (your patience for waiting is gone); leaving you in an angry mood.

Based on this example alone, we can all realize that being patient will provide us with a positive mood.

So what does patience in marriage mean?

It means being patient with your spouse, your kids, and marriage.

Furthermore, it means we have to be patient with our spouses’ when they hurt or make us angry unintentionally, when our children are disobedient, and when our marriages’ are not what we want them to be.

Imagine belittling your spouse or child just because you were angry about something trivial they did.

How do you feel moments after? Not a great feeling right?

This feeling alone implies being patient is the best solution when we are angered by our spouses’, children, or something else.

How you, your spouse, and your marriage can benefit from being patient.

There are many instances that patience can be implemented in your marriage.

Everyday moments we can all benefit and relate to are:

» When fighting fairly or arguing with your spouse.

» When your spouse is not paying attention or listening to you.

» When your kids are being disobedient, creating a mess in the living room,

» When you are having difficulty communicating with your spouse.

» When your marriage is not where you wish it was.

Benefits of patience in marriage

» Patience towards your spouse allows you to think before you speak and before you react.

» Patience lets your spouse have some freedom to vent their frustration from a stressful day.

» It enables you to love your spouse in such a beneficial way.

» Having patience with each other will help you to fight and argue less. You will also have calm discussions. It encourages good communication in marriage.

During our first year of marriage, I will admit, I did not have any patience, my husband had a lot of it. 

Eventually, his patience did rub off on me. I have since learned and grown in my patience. I came to realize if he snapped at me, as much, or as quickly as I did to him, I would feel so hurt.

So why would I continue to do this to him? A big apology was in order, and I began the hard journey of learning patience in marriage. – Ashley

8 Practical tips for couples

Practice the simple tips below so you can be more patient in your marriage and with your spouse, husband or wife.

1. It takes time, therefore practice being patient every day.

2. Decide to be patient whenever you are angered.

3. Be patient with your spouse. Remember, love is patient.

4. Patience is not for one spouse, both spouses’ need to learn and apply it.

5. You being patient will help your children to be patient too. They are watching you carefully.

6. It will be required to understand each other.

7. It is necessary for a healthy, happy, and fulfilling marriage.

8. When you make a mistake, learn from it, and try again.

The presence of patience in marriage is great.

But the lack of patience is very destructive. Therefore having patience with your spouse is crucial for your marriage!

“Patience is bitter, but it’s fruit is sweet.” Jean-Jacques Rousseau

Your turn:

What does patience with your spouse mean to you?

How do you apply it in your marriage?

Image courtesy ALP Studios


How to Communicate with Your Spouse Without Fighting in 7 Simple Steps

How to Say Sorry to Your Wife or Husband in 7 Steps

How to Write a Love Letter to Your Husband or Wife in 10 Simple Steps