page contents

friendship in marriageFriendship in marriage builds intimacy and helps married couples to open up to their  insecurities without worrying about being judged.

In a marriage where the couples are or eventually become best friends, the marriage blossoms.

Does your spouse deserve to be your best friend?

Yes! You might not agree with us, which is fine. You are still our friend. And its okay to have one or two differences.

Who is your best friend?

Your best friend has similar interests as yours, shares their joys and sorrows with you, and nicely critiques your bad actions (and vice versa).

Would you agree that your husband or wife also does the same thing for you?

The difference between your best friend (if him/her is not your spouse) and your spouse is that your spouse shares the same bed with you.

In addition, your spouse has committed to spending his/her entire life with you. So why not choose them to be your best friend?

Even though some people might say your spouse should not be your best friend, we think they should be.

You have to decide for yourself and do whats best for your marriage; you are unique.

Having your spouse as your best friend is certainly one of the best perks for marriage.

I remember when we were dating and Marcus had a friend who is like a brother to him.

I referred to his friend as his best friend, Marcus corrected me and said that was a title he was saving for his wife, that his wife would be the only one with that title.

Obviously I became his best friend, and that is something special between us. -Ashley

Ever since the time I knew I wanted to have a family someday, I came to the conclusion that, the person I settle down with will become my best friend.

This is a decision I made, and a title I reserved just for “her”. – Marcus

We have enjoyed being best friends, and look forward to the growing together in the years to come.

You must still have close friends (of the same-sex) outside of your marriage.

Never discount the essence of having close friends simply because your spouse is your best friend.

Your close friends will be the ones to quickly identify, and recommend changes in certain behaviors you and your spouse may never notice. They will also challenge you to love your spouse, and improve your marriage.

The term, “falling out of love” comes to mind.

If you nourish your friendship with your spouse as well as your intimacy, your marriage should blossom into a beautiful friendship with a deep mature love. We have experienced this in our marriage.

Just when I think I can’t possibly love Marcus more, I look back and realize, I had this thought not too long ago and was pleasantly surprised.

Friendship in marriage is very important.

Just as friendships are important in life.

The benefits are similar, although building friendship in marriage is easier than building friendships with other people.

In marriage, its going to be your husband or wife, without the stress of trust issues unless trust has been broken.

Plus, why should you marry someone you do not trust?

How to become best friends in marriage.

In order to build a great friendship in your marriage you first must sit down with your spouse, and identify all the attributes you each want in a best friend.

Then, write these attributes down, and work hard on yourself to become the best friend you want to see in your spouse.

Work hard on yourself until you become the best friend you want to see in your spouse.

It will not happen overnight, but you will eventually become that person and experience the impact it will have on your marriage.

Your marriage will simply be taken to another level.

The 7 things below can also help you and your spouse on your journey to become best friends.

1. Be there to cheer each other on.

2. Grow together, hand in hand partnership, and doing activities together.

3. Connect with each other in different ways.

4. Be there for your spouse to lean on you during the tough times your spouse, and your marriage goes through.

5. Be honest, so you and your spouse can trust each other.

6. Share in the joys, victories, achievements, and successes of each other.

7. Appreciating each other.

Just like any friendship and relationship it takes nourishment to grow.

Nurturing friendship in marriage requires practice and intentionality. If you are not intentional about it, it will not just show up.

When was the last time you picked money from trees?

You probably never have, and probably never will. You have had to always work hard to earn your money.

The same principle applies to friendship and marriage.

It requires time and effort.

Therefore you have to work hard to build a great friendship, and becoming best friends in your marriage.

If you and your spouse are best friends, that’s fantastic. If you are not, what is preventing you two from becoming best friends in your marriage?

What are you waiting for?

Physical things don’t last. They will fade eventually, but true friendship will not fade.

True emotional and spiritual intimacy in friendship transcends time. Friendship is one of the many characteristics of healthy, happy, and lasting marriages.

Your turn:

What do you and your spouse do to keep your friendship growing?

How has having your spouse as your best friend impacted your life, and your marriage? Share your thoughts in the comments section below.

Image courtesy Joacoaranoa